Hurt and healing

Recently I was explaining to someone why I give less energy to certain people in my life and why I have changed so much lately. And that person said to me “why are you changing and how long are you going take to heal?” That’s quite interesting. Thing is that person has a point but also there’s a misunderstanding. There is no time limit to heal. Let’s be honest, how long someone takes to heal from something emotionally or physically should not be determined by anyone else. In fact, I may not know how long I will take to heal from things. That’s a process on its own.

While healing, you ought to notice and question things that happened in the past. That’s fine. Because you allow yourself to feel and open that wound for awhile. But you have to close it after sometime, after analyzing what had happened and how you really feel. After exploring your feelings, it is important to figure out where you want to be example achieving emotional stability. Then, you gotta try different methods, in other words, create your own path. Drinking, sex, gambling are all distractions and are not healthy coping or healthy healthy mechanisms. They numb the pain for awhile but it never helps to heal. Lots of people desire quick fixes to their problems. Unfortunately, there isn’t. It is a process that can seem frustrating. There will be days where you feel okay and then there are days where you feel all the memories and pain hitting you rapidly. But that is how it is my friends.

There is nothing wrong with feeling things. We are humans although based

on some people’s actions we think they aren’t human but they are. There are people who seem heartless or careless about anything but they do feel and have emotions. How they deal with it we may never know. For instance, I go numb when something bad happens or I may be irritable and moody.When that happens, I learnt that moving away from the situation and clearing my mind for awhile before thinking about a solution is the best method for me. That method may not always work for certain situations. It is quite difficult and impossible to plan ahead about how we are going to to react to something because life is very unpredictable.

I also know what it feels like to not tell people how you feel because you don’t want to seem weak or emotional. Honestly, you don’t have to tell everyone how you feel because that is not important to them or may not be beneficial to you.However, if you are close to someone or trust someone like a close friend then feel free to turn to them. As long as you are comfortable and ready to open up,then do it. That person you open up to ought to be a good listener and you should know that before opening up because you do not want your business out on the road or on social media. I had experiences where I thought I could turn to a good friend and turns out that person did not care or seem to be interested in being a good friend to me at that time. And that hurts and made me think about not opening up to people again but the thing is not everyone is a bad friend. Choose wisely.

The most important thing is that you know you feel and you determine what plan of action you are going to execute to feel good again. There are tons of blogs and articles related to different experiences and how to heal. Be proactive and try some but remember that you should really want to heal before you jump in this new journey. You have to want what is best for you. No one can decide that but you. Only you know how you feel and why. You owe no one any explanation for your healing process. Just ensure that you do not hurt people along the way. Get rid of negativity and toxic people around you. It may be that you end up alone because you were always around toxic people and that is okay. Being alone is better than being around bad company. Focus on yourself and eventually you will attract good people in your life. It could one or two new friends but nothing is wrong with that as long as you

are happy and that you feel safe around them.

There is so much to talk about regarding this topic and it is something I am passionate about. If you want to talk more about this,you can hit me up on social media. I am not a expert as yet. I am on this journey as well and it is tough at times

but it is something I have to do. Also, my blogs vary in theme. I try to switch it up and give perspectives on various things. If you do have a topic of interest, let me know please and thank you. Hopefully we all blossom and spread sunshine in this world. Be kind and caring to yourself and to others out there.

Hugs and kisses,

Reshma Catherine.

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Most times, we don’t really know how we truly feel or why. During the healing process, notice those things. Let yourself feel. Don’t hide the pain. Sit and think about it. Do what you gotta do to heal. How someone heals from traumatic events may not be how you will heal effectively. Trial and error must occur for you to discover the best mechanism or mechanisms possible. Key term: healthy mechanisms.